Month 8 Diary

Oh boy, we are getting to the final stretch. Belly is bigger than ever and the house has been coming together in preparation for you, our new roomie. We had our baby shower a couple of weeks ago and it was small, lovely, and just the way I wanted to celebrate you. Unfortunately, promptly after we caught covid (I won’t tell you which of your loving aunts blessed us with that gift!), but fortunately we are much better now and back in preparation mode.

I only have 2 weeks until my maternity leave starts, which has been stressful. It will be a reality check to let go of work and accept a new routine, but I am excited for the challenge and mostly excited to be 100% present with you. It will also be nice for dad and I to celebrate our last holiday season as a duo. And even better for me to be able to lounge around the house, as I am experience more and more discomfort and pain by the day. Our 9th anniversary is just days before your due date so who knows what that will look like, regardless we are incredibly eager to meet you and wouldn’t mind in the least if you came early to celebrate with us. Just a month or so to go little one, see you very soon!

2023 Intentions

I’ve been thinking of what I want more of in 2023, and also what I want less of. Here’s whats been on my heart.

More:

Candid photos

Leisurely naps

Asking for help

Reading on the beach

Cooking delicious meals

Searching for the silver lining

Letting go of what’s not serving me

Doing things just for the fun of it

Unplanned, quality time with loved ones

Less:

Self-judgement

Overfilling my plate

Acting out of “obligation”

Feeling guilty about silly things

Trying to control the uncontrollable

2022 Reflections

2021 was a year of deep grief and growth for me. 2022 was my year of budding and patience. 2023 will be a true test of how much of that growth I can apply to my day to day.

This year has had a lot of “down time” while I was sick or just limited by pregnancy. This time allowed me to reflect on what matters most and the limitations showed my what is actually a “requirement” in my life and what is non-essential.

Recently, I happened upon “Kolb Learning Styles” which a theory that there is a 4 stage process to truly learning something: experience, reflection, learning, experimentation (and then back to experience). The experimentation, or as I like to think of it implementation, piece is the part I think I can miss out on at times. But it is the critical part where you take what you learned and apply it to your life. For instance last year I learned that I try to control so much of my life to create stability due to my unstable upbringing. And that often works for me, but at times I try to control what is uncontrollable and that can lead to suffering for me. So in 2022 I have been trying to identify what is worth trying to control and accepting what isn’t.

Along those lines, next year I truly want to implement the practice of putting in effort and then letting go when I have done all I can and trusting that my effort was enough. My 2023 word of the year is Release. I know that parenthood is going to come with some many things outside of my control. I am going to be working with a little human and partner with their own ways of doing things and I anticipate acceptance of that might be tough for me initially. But I am making it my goal to release the stranglehold I try to have on life and take things as they come. I want to summon the wisdom to know when I need to step in and when I can let others step in (or maybe even not). There might be a lot of “letting go” in 2023 and I am excited to see how that changes me.

My hope is that this year I will release the tension in my jaw, my expectations, the tight hold grip I have on my life and embrace all the unknown that is to come. I’m want this next chapter to feel like an exciting adventure. Much like when I started my business, I think becoming a parent will be this new exciting challenge I am totally unprepared for but eager to figure out. Only unlike with my business the goal will be to enjoy each day and try not to look to far down the line at specific end goals.

Month 7 Diary

We’re seven months in and you’ve become the cutest little wiggle worm ever. At 29 weeks we did a 3D ultrasound to see a sneak peek of you and you somehow were on your very best behavior! You slept through the entire scan, only slightly waking here and there when the techs probe disturbed you. We watched you yawn, and snooze on your right arm, bent back just the way I sleep. We were all charmed by you and are even more eager to meet you in person.

I can tell you are growing faster than ever because I am constantly hungry and I can feel you stretch in attempt to make more room for yourself. I feel bad that you are only going to get more cramped from here on, but I promise we’ll make up to you with all the little luxuries we’ve been preparing.

Second Trimester Must Haves

Woo! The first trimester is over (thank goodness) but now there is a whole new phase of pregnancy to face. Here are a few items that made my 2nd trimester a lot more tolerable.

Balance Ball - Buy one early, I’ll say the same for the belly band in a moment. While early on you may not see a big change to your body and belly, rest assured changes are taking place and a balance/yoga ball will be one of the most comfortable places to sit. It will also come in handy as the baby grows and you prepare for labor. I even would sit on the ball when the baby would get into awkward positions and somehow it helped to reposition him.

Belly Band - I experienced a lot of round ligament pain and the only thing that kept me mobile from early on was my belly band. Even bore I was showing much it significantly helped, get one sooner than later, I promise it will help with the random aches and pains.

Babyletto Sigi glider - If you’re planning to get a comfy nursing chair you may as well get it now. I love mine and am so happy we splurged on something comfy and high quality because I’ve been using it for months now and sometimes it’s the only chair that eases my back aches and pains.

Cushionaire Slippers - I experienced a lot of foot pain as my body changed and these slippers came in to save the day. They are cute and I’d only wear them around the house, but it was exactly what I needed to relieve the pain. I think they may also be good if you experience foot swelling as well.

Handheld fan - I also experienced a lot of hot flashes (it didn’t help that I went through my second trimester in the summer), and just ran very hot throughout this pregnancy. Instead of freezing out my husband and blasting the AC I just kept a cute rechargeable electric fan by my side and it did the trick. Mine even has a mister but I never needed to use it.

What's In My Bag | Mansur Gavriel Mini Mini Bucket Bag

This year I haven’t added much to my wardrobe. Given the current flux my body is experiencing with pregnancy, clothing hasn’t been something on my mind. I like to add pieces I know I will love for years to come, and since I have no idea what my body will look like week to week, much less postpartum, I have skipped garments and instead thought more about the accessories that jazz up my pretty basic outfits.

A new addition to my slowly developing bag collection is a beautiful smooth leather bucket bag in a neutral taupe-tan color. The Mansur Gavriel bucket bags have been on my wishlist for many years, initially I envisioned adding a black one to my collection but instead I added the Jenni Kayne bucket bag in black a few years ago. I absolutely love my JK bucket bag but one thing I have realized is that a large sized bucket bag is not my favorite. I love the look but I am not disciplined enough to not overstuff it and weigh down my shoulder. I also find manuevering a large, structured bucket tote a little cumbersome throughout the day.

All that said, this is why I started looking at the smaller Mansur Gavriel bucket bags. I had been eyeing one for summer but when this one popped up on sale for Black Friday in my preferred color, I had to pull the trigger.

Mansur Gavriel Mini Mini Bucket Bag on sale at ShopBop. Shop all the colors here.

Month 6 Diary

I cannot believe we are here. We are just about to leave the 2nd trimester and enter the last stretch of sharing this body of mine. You are growing so quickly, I am hungrier everyday (hungry as I type!) and the bump you call home is getting harder to hide. I love my little bump and all the activity you produce inside. Your kicks, wiggles, and punches are getting stronger by the day. We play a game now where I put my hand on my stomach and you seem to find it giving me a little thump to each place I move it. You’ve also stopped being so bashful when your dad touches the belly and you kick him just as hard as me. You used to go still at his touch every time and I wondered if you were trolling him or just hesitant to kick and unfamiliar person (how polite indeed).

The crib went up this week, your dad put it together eagerly as soon as it arrived. It brings us so much joy seeing it in our room, imagining you sleeping sweetly in it so soon.

I’ve also told folks at my job now and you have been getting so many well wishes already. The world is waiting for you, no one more eagerly than dad and I though.

Holiday Gift Ideas for the Ladies

Back with another holiday gift guide and essentially it is all things I have been coveting or have recently purchased for myself 😅. In case you are still searching for the perfect gift for your sister, mother, bff, or partner here is what I recommend!

Linen Pajama Set - I recently got myself two sets of these for postpartum and I can’t recommend them enough. After washing the linen was just the perfect amount of rumpled and the set is put together enough to make you feel cute while lounging around at home.

One line a day journal - this is the perfect gift for the sentimental friend who wants to start journaling without it needing to be too much of a burden to maintain.

Cashmere Cocoon Cardigan - if you follow me on Instagram you already know that I am obsessed with this cardigan and own it in several colors. I highly recommended this if you’re looking for a luxe yet thoughtful gift and am personally planning on giving it a couple special women this year.

Sézane’s Signature Scent - this perfume is so widely lived I think you could gift it to anyone and they would be ecstatic. And if they already have this beautiful perfume, they may also love Chanel’s Gabrielle.

Candles - my all time favorite candles are those of LAIT which are hand poured here in Los Angeles, but if your looking for more of a stocking stuffer these cuties from H&M would also do the trick. I also love their reusable votives.

Bucket Bag - I love a beautiful bag and I find this Mansur Gavriel one to be simpler timeless. In black or a tan you cannot go wrong and they have 3 sizes to choose from. Personally I love the mini mini, but the mini is another option for ladies who like a little more room in their bags!

Classic Jewels - you can never go wrong with a piece of jewelry. I personally love AUrate’s classic hoops and have had my eye on this necklace for a while now (hint hint to my hubby if he’s reading this!).

Noise Canceling Headphones - in such a busy and often loud world I find headphones to be a thoughtful gift of a little silence. These Sony over the ear ones are beautiful and super effective.

Oak Essentials Skincare - if you’ve seen my past reviews you know I love this minimal skincare line. The routine kit is the perfect way to gift someone you love a little self are in a beautiful package.

Month 5 Diary

My energy is significantly better and yours is off the charts. You love to wiggle and thump, and your kicks have gotten strong enough that we can see the skin of my belly protrude out as you explore your boundaries. I had a scare a this month when you were stiller than usual for two consecutive days. I missed your early morning dance wake up call and your evening dance session. Fortunately you were back to normal and feeling heavier than ever after those days passed. Maybe you were tired from a little growth spurt?

You seem to like when I sing along to songs in the car, or maybe you’re trying to tell me to knock it off. Either way it’s funny to feel you activate as I am driving to work or serenading your dad. Some days I look down at my belly and can’t believe you are in there. It is still surreal to me that you are having your own independent experience of life, right there tied to mine yet completely different. I asked your dad recently what could you be thinking. My theory is that you’re in the womb, present in a way that will be lost after some time earthside. Just experiencing each moment, not lost in the past or pondering the future. It’s comforting for me to believe.

This month you also went on your first road trip! Your auntie and uncle, Alissa and Saleh, came to visit and we have a fantastic time. They love you so much already. Although it seemed that anytime anyone other than me touches my belly you like to stop moving! Trolling us maybe? Eventually Alissa did catch your thumps after about a week of trying. It’s like whale watching, patience patience. All in all it was a wonderful vacation. We can’t wait for you to meet all of your family and to take you on road-trips when you’re here.

Glimpses of Our Baby Shower

In early November we had our hybrid (virtual/in person) baby shower to celebrate baby and it was better than I could have expected. I was initially on the fence about celebrating given the holidays and covid, but in the end my sister and cousin convinced me and I am so glad they did! Here are a few shots from the set-up and you can find a some more on my Instagram.

Month 4 Diary

What a big month for us all. We made it through the first trimester together, a feat I truly wasn’t sure of at times. This month I started gaining my weight back, all in the belly. I finally began to look pregnant although my little bump has been easy to hide. I take each day as it comes, many are good but some are tough, and this new found pregnancy insomnia has appeared out of nowhere. Regardless, I feel more like my self and incredibly grateful to have most of my first trimester symptoms lessening.

Around 17 weeks I was pretty sure I felt you moving around down there. You felt like little bubbles popping and eventually tiny little thumps. Our doctor confirmed that I have a posterior placenta so I was indeed feeling you moving around (and not just hallucinating your quickening!).

This month (well really week 19) we had our second trimester genetic screening and anatomy scan. And you are doing amazing, we are so relieved and even more proud. I never thought the parental pride could kick in so soon, but I am swelling with it. During the 7am scan you were so active, my fault for scheduling it during one of your most active periods. And I am sure the orange juice I drank that morning didn’t help. But the tech was still able to get pictures of every part of you. We did realize that the placenta is a little too low, so we are watching that, but I am optimistic it will resolve itself.

Holiday Gift Ideas For the Fellas

I don’t know about you, but shopping for the men in my life is always the hardest. I don’t know if it’s because they all tend to buy what they want and need when they want, or if the men I love just have very niche interests! Regardless, here are a few super practical gifts I have either recently gifted or plan to give this holiday season.

Hypervolt Pro 2 Massage Gun - This massage gun is at the very top of my list if you a planning to spend a couple hundred on a gift this season. We have had a Hypervolt in our household for about a year and it is used nearly every single day. We opted for this one instead of the Theragun or other brands because the reviews are just excellent and geared toward athletes.

Apple Air Tags - Air tags! I don’t know about you, but my husband is such a gadget guy and has been talking about air tagging luggage and some other random bags we use on the move. I am planning to surprise him with a set this holiday season!

Nike Backpack - A good gym bag or backpack is so key to building healthy habits and looking forward to getting to the gym, at least in our household. I really love the simplicity and functionality of this one and this one from Nike.

Stylish Tumbler - Uber practical, but also chic, this Kinto tumbler is perfect for the colder weather to keep warm bevvies hot longer while looking aesthetically pleasing.

Cashmere Beanie - I think cashmere is the perfect thing to gift as many people tend not to splurge and treat themselves to it regularly. A cashmere beanie is the perfect entryway into luxurious accessory that is bount to get lots of use.

Luxe Bathrobe - Another luxury item I don’t think most men are willing to splurge on is a bathrobe. Ever since I got my husband his first robe, which he insisted he didn’t need, he has worn it daily and loves it.

Cozy Slippers - Slippers are along this same line as a robe, who doesn’t love a cozy pair of slippers?!

Shoe Cleaning Kit - If you’re looking for something a little unique maybe some care items to help you loved one maintain things he already owns. This shoe cleaning kit caught my eye and can help them develop a new ritual for years to come.

Leaf Reusable Razor - Finally, I am looking to get my partner this reusable, plant-friendly razor this year. I am hoping this performs better than the disposable ones and helps our household reduce waste in the long run.

Month 3 Diary

This month has been another tough one. But the biggest highlight has been getting our NIPT test and NT scan results back! You are looking healthy and we found out your gender, you’re a boy! I like to joke that you’ll be just like your daddy, another Capricorn man will be living in our home and I am not mad about it. Hopefully you’ll grow to be an amazing person just like him.

As for me, I am still suffering from nausea, vomiting, aversions, fatigue, and weight loss. It’s tough, but knowing that you are well and thriving keeps me going.

The Perfect Cashmere Turtleneck

Sweater season is upon us and bundling up in one is something I look forward to as soon as temps drop below 70. This year I have found myself reaching for what I am now calling the perfect turtleneck sweater. Just the fact I am writing a review about it speaks volumes as I don’t typically review a single clothing item unless it is truly something to write home about.

Last year I picked up my first in ivory and no fail, everyone I wore it I received an unsolicited compliment. It’s such a luxe and chic sweater that immediately makes me feel like I should be a character on Big Little Lies. This year I grabbed a neutral sandy brown version in a size up (Medium) to accommodate my bump and surprisingly it is the perfect sweater to go a little incognito pregnancy wise. I wear it over dresses and leggings and under my favorite outerwear for extra warmth.

I think the cut combined with the ribbing, generous neck, and perfect length lend to this sweater being a timeless investment piece. I particularly love that The cashmere feels substantial and I have not had to depill or wash either yet! All in all a sweater worth of a little extra praise.

Baby Shower Planning

Now that I am officially in my 3rd trimester, I have been looking forward to celebrating baby with my closest family members. I’ve never been one for throwing extravagant parties; my partner and I eloped, I never had big graduation parties, typically I like to keep things low key. But let’s just say the journey into parenthood has changed that! My lovely sister and cousin are hosting this event, but I got to plan the “artistic direction.” I knew I wanted something soft and filled with flowers. I also wanted the colors to be gender neutral and more about what I liked than a color representing baby. Here’s what we came up with!

We’ll like order our catering from a local mediterranean grill. I am thinking chicken kebabs, rice, salad, and a few delicious mezze dips. For dessert we found a lovely local cake maker who bakes stunning naked cakes. We’re also planning to bake cookies that will also make it into the take-home goodie bags. As far as drinks, we will have an assortment of Italian sodas and my sister and cousin are planning peach bellinis.

As far as take home gifts for our guests, I fell in love with P.F. Candle Co’s “Golden Coast” scent on my recent road trip (up the golden coast!). We’re going to gift those candles with the homemade cookies and incense bundles.

Decor wise we are planning to make fresh floral bouquets, hang delicate bunting here and there, using pretty compostable tableware to brighten things up, and create a very dramatic balloon garland!

What We’ve Purchased

Balloon Garland

Crepe Paper Bunting

Custom Invitations

Small Plates

Large Plates

Cocktail Scalloped Napkin

Large Scalloped Napkins

Wooden Cutlery

Cupcake Wrapper

Cookie Sleeves

Gift Bags

Decorative Ribbon

That’s all for now! I’ll try to share how the party shapes up and include some of the activities my generous hosts incorporate!

Month 2 Diary

We’re pregnant! I cannot believe it. You are just an itty bitty clump of cells but will soon become our newest family member. This news is a whirlwind of emotions and excitement. I am dying to scream it from the rooftops but and hesitant to tell anyone because nothing feels certain. The month before you we had a very early loss, so we are proceeding with cautious optimism. But this time it feels like perfect timing. In my heart I know you are on your way.

After our first faint positive pregnancy test I kept testing my HG levels every day (from April 30th to May 11th), slowly watching the line darken as my hormone level rose. Eventually we finally saw you on an ultrasound. Hearing your heartbeat for the first time (on May 31st) brought tears to me and your daddy’s eyes. It was the most magical moment and we fell in love with you right then and there.

First Trimester Must Haves

Hello from the other end of my first (and second) trimester! This spring I went MIA because I was super sick, but sick for the best reason possible. I am expecting! My husband and I are over the moon excited but we’re also utterly unprepared for the reality check my first trimester had in store. I had very severe “morning” sickness, aversions, sensitivity to smell, and fatigue. Honestly fatigue is an understatement in comparison to what it felt like. Needless to say it was tough and my life became focused on basic survival. Eat, hydrate, work from bed, and sleep with a desperate shower thrown in there somewhere.

Now that I am on the other side of that (knocks on wood) I have a reflections on what made those first months a bit more bearable.

If this is your first time pregnancy (or know a newly pregnant person) the first thing you should invest in is a pregnancy pillow, and invest in it early. Sleep is such a precious thing throughout pregnancy, a precious but fleeting thing. Don’t think you need to have a full blown belly to start using one. I love my bbhugme body pillow and wish I had bought it even sooner. I spent countless hours in bed sick and this pillow gave me the extra comfort I needed to rest in different positions comfortable. And my husband has already called dibs on it postpartum!

My Oak Essentials Dew Oil, was a savior for my dry skin and growing belly. I had very severe aversions to smells and this was one of the few products in my bathroom that I could stand during the worst of my first trimester nausea. You can get 15% off all Oak Essentials and Jenni Kayne products with my affiliate code GINAS15 at jennikayne.com.

Because I was in bed and unwell for so long, my airpods became my best friend. I loved having them at my bedside to take calls, listen to music and audiobooks, and simply keep me company during my misery! I can’t tell you how incredibly boring it was for my to be physically unable to do anything so having reliable and comfortable headphones was essential.

On the topic of entertainment during the first trimester, I found the book Nurture by Erica Chidi to be a gentle and reassuring introduction in to pregnancy and partenthood. Chidi emphasizes trusting your intuition and body, and not falling into the trap of comparison. This is a great gift for new and experienced parents alike!

Another most loved item was a cozy robe to hg my body as it underwent so many rapid changes. I actually ended up getting one heavyweight robe for cooler days and a lightweight one for warmer ones. My favorite brand for robes has been Coyuchi and I highly recommend the waffle robe and solstice robe. And if you use my referral link, you can get $60 off purchases of $300 (and I’ll get a $60 credit too!).

Lastly, a foot massager was absolutely essential for me. Despite actually loosing weight in my first trimester (so no extra weight from baby adding pressure) and rarely being out of bed, I experienced some severe foot pain. The practice of daily reflexology became one of the few self care activities I had the energy for and if made such a difference. Before bed I would just roll my feet along the device and suddenly the stress began melt away and I could climb back into bed.

Oak Essentials Skincare Review

A little over a year ago I started using the Oak Essentials skincare routine, and I have to say I don’t think I’ll be looking for new products anytime soon. Oak Essentials recently released two new serums, which they sent me to try out. The day serum has vitamin C and is supposed to help with collagen production and balancing discoloration. The night serum has retinol and smooths texture and supports an even tone.

• Cleansing Balm - Of all the products the cleansing balm is the one I reach for the least. While I love an oil cleanser, I prefer washing my face in the shower and this balm isn’t the best for that.

• Balancing Mist - This is my favorite product of the entire line. The scent is divine and I truly feel the toning properties do balance out the pH of my skin.

• Daily Vitamin C Serum - This serum is a new top favorite product. It’s non-sticky and lightweight, it also feels lovely underneath my spf and make-up.

• Ritual Oil - I love love love this oil. I personally have preferred lightweight, vitamin rich face oils and this certainly is that.

• Moisture Rich Balm - Nice, but not may favorite. Personally I prefer using just the ritual oil unless I am suffering from severe dryness.

• Restorative Mask - A lovely moisture retaining mask that always feels like a luxury.

• Nightly Retinol Serum - I haven’t tried the retinol serum as I am expecting, but look forward to adding back to my routine once I pop this baby out!

• Dew Body Oil - I absolutely love this body oil, it’s been a go to for my stretch skin and growing bump since the start of my pregnancy. I even include it in my first trimester favorites!

Sézane Summer to Fall Transitional Styles

Summer has come to an end, but I wanted to share the Sezane pieces I picked up this summer. The beauty of all these pieces is that they are all perfect for the transition from summer to fall.

From left to right:

• Gaspard Jumper - I love this classic cardigan tucked in as a top for the very French laid back look. It will be perfect for layering as the temperatures start to drop and top with a contrasting jacket.

• Marcelo Top in white - this tank is the perfect base layer. I love how thick and structured the rib knit is. The white is classic and will go a long way underneath button-ups and sweaters this fall.

• Striped Tomboy Shirt - what I love most about this shirt is how well tailored and timeless it is. The fabric is high quality and I can see this wearing in beautifully over the years. I often like to thrift well made mens shirts, but inevitably the fit is a bit too oversized. This shirt is cut and finished like a man’s but with a woman’s body in mind giving the best of both worlds.

• Marcelo Top in grey - I loved the white tank so much I naturally had to have this tank in another color! The greay is great to wear alone, but I am sure I’ll layer with it until the weather is warm again.

• Gatsby Marinière - I love a breton stripe, it just screams summer by the sea. But I also love a classic through the fall, winter, and spring as well. The Gatsby is a boxy breton with a perfect placket with tiny buttons down the front so you can switch up the neckline. You can event layer collared shirts underneath which I am planning to try this fall/winter. I think it will hold well with under layers due to the very structured organic cotton knit, anything lighter-weight or stretchier would become crumpled and messy looking with under layers.

• Dorine Top - Last but not least, the Dorine Top. I think this lovely open crochet crop top will look fantastic layered over body-con dresses and turtlenecks. I feel like that will be the perfect way to add a bit more outfit interest and a tab more warmth as well!

September New Additions

September is my birthday month and this year it truly snuck up on me. I had just gotten back from a wonderful road trip and visit with family so I wasn’t in much mood to do anything. Instead, I decided to treat myself to some new wardrobe items!

I have to thank Instagram for serving me a very convincing ad for my first purchase, the One Quince leather moto jacket. I have always found a classic black leather jacket to be a closet staple, and unfortunately my last one had to be passed on to my sister when I sized out of it. Ever since I have had a small gap in my jacket collection… until now. This one is super affordable, lightweight, and the perfect balance of fitted but roomy enough to layer with.

I also picked up a couple of maternity items to accommodate my growing bump and were super pleased with this super soft striped dress and this lounge set. Both of these will (hopefully) also work postpartum. I typically try to avoid H&M, but tbh I didn’t want to invest much in clothing I may not wear for very long.

Last year I fell in love with my black Brooklyn Lug Boots, so this season I jumped at the chance to get them in this brown color. These boots are incredibly comfortable and a practical yet timeless take on the chunky utility boot.

Lastly, although late in the season, I finally got myself a pair of Birks! I desperately needed comfortable everyday shoes, and since I live in LA these Arizona Sandals are essentially wearable year-round.