Anxiety is caused by thoughts about the future

I was once told:

Worry is like a rocking chair. You go back and forth and back and forth but you never get anywhere.

It's so true, but how do we break the cycle of panic and worry? While doing my morning pages (a stream of consciousness journaling exercise I do most mornings) I came to realize that all of my anxiety was coming from knowing too much about this coronavirus crisis and overthinking it. I mean to say that if it were spreading and we didn't know I wouldn't be feeling any anxiety at all, I'd be in blissful ignorance and all my stress about it wouldn't exist. But we, fortunately, do know what is happening and yet I am using this information for both good (preparedness) and bad (overthinking and panic). Instead of going the overthinking route I am trying to instead just take the information we have and take preventative measures (additional handwashing, social distancing, stocking my pantry, supporting my family and community) to make the situation better. 

Yesterday I listened to Stressproof, episode 55. This podcast is quickly becoming one of my favorites. Susan Choi, the host, said:

During anxiety, on a subconscious level, we are resisting a possible future reality which keeps us stuck in the loop of anxious thoughts. 

This resonated with me so much. Susan explains that a lot of our anxiety stems from future-thinking and running through the multitudes of possible futures, and then rejecting the negative ones even though they haven't happened yet.

I have decided to let go of all that stress and the uncertainty of the future and treat it a little more like all the other uncertainty that exists in life that we are typically unaware of on a daily basis. This doesn't mean pretending like what is happening isn't. But it means accepting that the future isn't certain so I may as well do the little I can and be present in the now. 

Luxury is a feeling more than anything

We are all at home and the days are probably blurring together. I think it is very important these days to create little moments each day that differentiate one day from the next. When I don't I find myself getting bored and my thoughts drift toward being "stuck" at home instead of "safe" at home.

The little moments I am carving out for myself are what I am calling little luxuries. I think of luxury as something that is not necessary but gives me great comfort, and in my opinion, it doesn't have to cost a lot or anything at all.

So in that spirit here are some of the little luxuries I am using to make each day special:

• Sleep in. The easiest of them all for many of us. If you can, try it next weekend. Maybe be lavish about it and don't get out of bed until hunger forces you to. Bring a book, notebook, or something to bed with you the night before and after you wake-up (late) stay in bed even longer and read, journal, just hang out.

• Make a special breakfast. Last week I shared some recipes I have been loving, and in addition to these I just tried making a dutch baby this weekend, and boy was it easy and delicious!

• Schedule in hours of nothing time. We (read I) often underestimate the importance of rest. It is essential for our minds and bodies to function properly. And it is particularly important during times of unusual stress. Good sleep is essential, but I also find periods of active rest during my week where I am not responsible for doing anything, in particular, is so comforting. I like to block off time for me to relax, like having a long lunch where I can read or watch tv. Or an entire weekend afternoon that is not filled with housework or work work.

• Go for a long walk without your phone. Wow, what a difference disconnecting without my phone makes. I like to take my daily neighborhood walks without my phone now and again so I am not tempted to check emails, call someone, take photos, or be distracted in some other way. Having my phone in hand creates this urgency that I should be doing something else but when I don't have it I am able to immerse myself in the moment... what a luxury being present truly is.

• Take a long bath or shower and play some music. Such a simple thing, but it turns a daily "to do" into such a treat. Once in a while, I even like to get the diffuser going for some aromatherapy before I hope into the shower. It just reminds me to slow down to take care of myself. 

• And speaking of, do aromatherapy while you're working, cleaning, or just chilling. Light a candle, burn incense or run a diffuser. The extrasensory indulgence makes everyday activities feel special and more enjoyable. I really love eucalyptus oil and I am obsessed with Lait candles because their scents are very delicate and not overpowering while still filling the room (I actually was anti scented candles before I started using these!).

• Order in. If you are tired of cooking, just order in. Just take the proper precautions (contactless pick-up, removing all packaging from your home & cleaning, etc). I still find it to be such a gift that we can order in food amidst a pandemic and taking the responsibility of cooking off my partner and myself once in a while is the ultimate luxury.

What I Wore - Slow Fashion Spirit Week

Day 1 of Instagram challenge #slowfashionspiritweek created by @kalos__style and @cookiecat.herine. It was “fancy dress day” so I wore this printed dress that I typically reserve for beach days.

How to make Dalgona coffee (aka whipped coffee)

You've probably seen it all over the internet already, but in case you haven't, I am going to share how I am making Dalgona coffee these days!

Ingredients:

• instant coffee

• sugar (cane seems to work best for me)

• water

• milk or milk alternative

Combine in a bowl:

2 tablespoons of instant coffee

2 tablespoons of sugar

2 tablespoons of hot water

Now mix together and beat.

You're going to want to beat it until it becomes a light brown color and your arm feels like falling off!

Now spoon on top of however much milk you like!

Enjoy, but beware of how much caffeine is in there! I made the mistake of having a full serving to myself but now I split it into two servings (which still seems to be more caffeine than a regular coffee!)

For more info check out this video tutorial 

Work from home hacks (from someone who has been doing it for years)

Many of us are heading into week three of working from home and I’m hearing a lot about how it is not as easy as it seems. Creating healthy boundaries and breaking up the day is essential to not feeling like a blob at the end of the workday, take it from someone who has been working from home (and loving it!) for 3 years.

Here are some of my tips for creating a healthy work-from-home lifestyle:

• Wake-up with enough time to have your morning routine before reporting to work. I like to feel like I have had time for myself before logging on and diving into emails and slack messages. It allows my brain to wake up and for me to proactively set my mood for the day instead of starting work and being reactive to whatever comes up on my screen if I were to roll out of bed and logon. 

• Create a schedule and stick to it. If you say you'll be online at 8:30 every day make sure you logon ready to work at that time. Communicate your schedule to your colleagues and try not to do work things outside of these hours. Setting good boundaries is key to not feeling like your home-life is being overrun by your work duties.

• Create a logon routine. I have a routine when I logon, much like you would when you walk into the office. I like to turn on my favorite morning podcasts (Up First, Today, Explained, and The Daily), check-in on slack, scan my emails for urgent items,  and then open up my calendar to plan my day and block off my schedule with meetings and tasks. Spending the first hour-ish of most days with this routine gets me out of "home mode" and into "work mode."

• Keep work-issued and personal devices separate, if possible. Having a digital boundary between work and home has helped me not think about work on my off-hours and just keep files where they need to be.

• Have a specific work area you report to, free of distractions and clutter. Best of it is well lit too if you’ll be doing video conferences. Going to the same spot each day, at least at the start of your day, will help make working from home feel more "official."

• Invest in good headphones (with a mic) if you are co-working from home or are working from a noisy environment. Noise is such an easy distraction that can be eliminated easily.

• Similarly, invest in a comfortable chair. It will make all the difference, I promise.

• Keep a bottle of water within reach. It is so easy for me to forget to drink water when I am home all day, but staying hydrated helps you not feel fatigued throughout the day and be more productive.

• Take regular breaks and try not to eat meals at your desk while you work. And what I find works well for me is having set breaks that I can look forward to a create a rhythm to my day.

• If you have a hard time focusing, try the Pomodoro Method. It's a great way to work in sprints and incentivize getting things done. Essentially you set a timer to work for 25 minutes and then take a 5-minute break. I use the Tide app's focus function to time myself.

• Turn off notifications (Slack, email, etc.) during non-working hours. This goes back to keeping a strict work schedule where possible. Even if you don't respond to incoming messages, but you get the notifications, you will have work on your mind when you're in your off-hours creating dormant anxiety.

• Have an end of day transition routine for when you log off. I like to go for a walk then take a shower before starting my evening at home. These activities just break the day up and let my mind ease out of the workday.

I hope some of these suggestions are helpful in making your work-from-home life more enjoyable!

10+ things I like do when I am feeling stressed

With the current coronavirus outbreak, it seems like most of the battle is maintaining a healthy mental attitude. Admittedly this has been very hard for me so I have a few small acts I go to when I need to beat the mental overwhelm.

• Turn off all devices. I find a lot of my overwhelm is from information overload and the easiest thing for me to do is unplug from my phone, the podcasts, and any other source of external info for a little bit.

• Power nap. Sleep can cure just about anything.

• Take a shower. I don't know what it is about taking random showers in the middle of the day, but for me, they seem to wipe the slate clean.

• Go for a walk. Fresh air, hopefully, some sunshine, getting the body active. A walk almost always gives me a fresh perspective on things.

• Do a few stretches, maybe even a 10-minute yoga flow. I love these from Fightmaster Yoga.

• Make a cup of tea and sit down with a book. Escape into another world, get your brain focused on something else. Sometimes a healthy distraction is the way to go.

• Call my grandma (or anyone who lifts my spirits). 

• Journal. Sometimes I need to dive deeper into the negative feelings and getting them out on paper helps me look at my thoughts as something separate from myself, something less emotional.

• Meditate. If you meditate do it, if you don't know is a great time to learn how. I started meditating with Headspace and their basic course to get started is free to all.

• Ask for a hug. This one could be thought for those of use social distancing alone, but a hug (even virtual ones) from people who care always lifts the spirits and reminds me of all the love in the world despite it all.

• And if all else fails, binge watch Hyori’s Bed and Breakfast on Netflix. This show is the most relaxing thing on Netflix. I wanted to become a homesteader after watching it! And I swear you cannot be stressed while watching it.

How I Hygge Up My Home, Tips for Surviving Social Distancing

When I first learned about the Danish concept hygge I was ecstatic to know there is not only a word but also a whole culture around something I already love to do. Hygge ("hue-guh ") is essentially the feeling or a moment of cozy, calm contentment. 

These are some of the little details to create moments of hygge:

• Light a candle. This is the easiest way to create ambiance and if it's a scent you love double win.

• Dim the lights and stick with lamps, not overhead lighting. The right lighting can completely transform a spaces' atmosphere.

• Pour a hot drink. A tea, coffee, hot cocoa, no matter what you choose it will give you an instant cozy feeling.

• Bake something tasty. Not only can the act of baking be a calming experience, but the smell of baked goods wafting and then sharing your treats with loved ones is a majorly hygge.

• Put on some instrumental music in the background. I am currently obsessed with the Lush Lofi playlist on Spotify.

• Soft furnishings everywhere. A throw here, a few cushions there. Just enough so you can cuddle up comfortably.

• Fewer devices. Instead of scrolling on your phone try picking up a book or writing instead. It immediately slows you down and creates a more hygge experience.

• Wear cute and cozy socks. Just the act of seeing them on your feet will make you feel content.

What are your quick tips for feeling content at home?

Tips for making the perfect espresso at home

If you follow me on Instagram, you know I love a good cup of coffee. And after a few years of making it espresso in my Moka pot, I have picked up a few tricks along the way.

• Clean the pot. Some people say to leave the upper part of the pot unwashed to get a buildup of espresso for more flavor. This can actually make your espresso bitter so I like to wash my pot after every use. No need to wash with soap every time as it can be cumbersome to thoroughly get all the soap out, but a good rinse and wipe will do.

• Use purified, room temperature water. Some people say to use boiled water to speed up the heating process and prevent the coffee from burning, but I find it works better for me to just use filter water. And filtered or distilled is key because depending on where you live your water may be harder or softer and that affects the taste of your espresso as well as the metal of your Moka pot. 

• Use the right amount of water. Another major key is to add the right amount of water, never fill the bottom past the vent. And if you like super strong coffee you can play with using even less water than usual to get a stronger flavor.

• Find the right grind, and use good quality coffee beans. I like experimenting with local roasters' darker blends. The grind should be close the that of a traditional espresso machine. Fine, but not too fine. You are looking for something like table salt and less coarse than powdered sugar.

• Don't overpack the coffee pod. The water in the bottom of the pot needs to be able to percolate up through the coffee grinds to you don't want to press down on the grinds firmly like you would with other espresso machines. Filling the pod and giving it a light press will do fine.

• Heat low and slow, and remove from the heat as so as the coffee starts making a gurgling sound. I find making it this way avoids overheating the coffee avoiding that burnt taste you can get when you do.

• Store your pot assembled but not tightly screwed on. This might seem like a trivial thing but by storing it this way your rubber gasket will last longer giving you a better seal and overall better espresso. 

• Practice because you'll only figure out just how you like it by doing!

Do you have any tips or tricks for the perfect espresso? Let me know!! 

And for all of the tools I use (plus some cute mugs), I have an amazon list here (I encourage you to also not buy them on Amazon, it's just the most convenient way for me to make lists at the moment).

What I Wore: A Busy Workday

I just got back from vacation on Sunday and as expected this week has been a busy one. I just launched the pre-order for Two Days Off’s spring line which includes 6 new styles!
Wednesday was busy with running errands, shooting content, responding to customer inquiries, and catching up on my books so I knew I needed a power outfit and a long lunch in the park to keep me going.

Outfit details:

Two Days Off Kaneko Dress

ABLE Selam Backpack & Sandals (15% off with GinaStovall15)

What I Wore: Weekend Errands

This weekend I was running about unwinding from a busy past couple of weeks. But at the same time I am traveling next week so there are inevitably last minute errands to be run. This outfit was perfect for a trip to the diner and in and out shops, and to be honest I think it will be my new uniform anytime the weather dips below 65F in LA!

Outfit details:

Jenni Kayne Cotton Fisherman Sweater (get 20% off with code GINAS20)

ABLE Selam Backpack (15% off with GinaStovall15)

Cole Haan Ankle Bootie

10 year old Gap Boyfriend Jeans

Microfiber Accountability

I talk a lot about reducing my single-use plastic waste, but last year I started learning about micro plastics and how they are wreaking havoc on our oceans, food supply, and physical health.

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One thing I didn’t know until last year is that my clothes are shedding microfibers as were wear and wash them. Shedding isn’t much of a problem when it comes to organic fibers (cotton, wool, linen, etc) because they will break down and not release harmful toxins. This is one of the reasons why for my clothing line, Two Days Off, I only use natural fibers. But for synthetics fabrics, they shed fiber often derived from petroleum that breaks down to release harmful toxins.

There are a few easy solutions to capture these microfibers that I have stumbled upon. One are bags to toss your synthetic clothing in like the one from Girlfriend Collective picture above; the guppy bag is another one that has been on the market for quite some time. There are also attachments you can add to your washing machine to capture the shed fibers like this one.
Since I live in an apartment and don’t have an in-unit washer dryer, the bag was the best option for me. I also don’t have much clothing made from synthetic fabrics except for my work out clothes and swim wear so I think just one bag should work for me.

I’m eager to try this out and see what accumulates in the bag! Maybe I’ll share a follow-up if it is interesting.

Plastic Freedom: Cleancult

In my latest foray of de-plasticing my life I have gotten my hands on an array of household cleaners by cleancult.

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Cleancult products are made with clean, all natural ingredients and come in reusable shatter-resistant glass containers that are super cute and feel high-quality. Refills for the products come in plastic-free packaging and every time you place an order they offset the carbon emissions from your shipment! You can see why I am into them, right?

The next question is do the products work? I received a bar of soap, dryer balls, laundry detergent tablets, liquid dish soap, dishwasher tablets, liquid hand soap, and an all purpose cleaner spray in my kit. Thus far I have been happy with all of them, although the bar soap is nothing to write home about. What I think has been one of the most impressive products is the all purpose spray. I was super skeptical of natural all purpose sprays until this one. I love it for cleaning stuck on food on the stove and even soap scum in the tub!

I am looking forward to my first refill shipment so I can analyze the packaging it comes in, maybe I’ll share an update then.

If you are interested in trying out Cleancult for yourself use my code GINA15 for 15% off your first order. And check out my Instagram for a fun time lapse of me using the all purpose cleaner.

2019 Resolutions Report Card

Each year I typically look back on my past year’s resolutions and rate myself on how well I held up. Although I enjoy this process of reflection this year I am not going to grade myself. I’ve been reading this book called The Birth Order Book, and it’s opened my eyes to how self-critical I am. As a firstborn I am a bit of a perfectionist. In the past I wore my perfectionism as a badge of honor but now I understand how unhealthy it actually is. Long story short, I think forgoing the self grading this year is a step in the right direction.

Now onto my resolutions!

This year I wanted to focus on enjoying the process in all aspects of my life, resting more and not just when my body forced me to, and staying grounded in my faith.

Enjoying the process is such a process in itself. I have been working hard to reprogram re way my brain works for a few years now. I’ve always been a results driven person. I love the feeling of setting a goal and then pushing until I reach the finish line, typically sooner than expected. And once I do I immediately move on I the next thing if I haven’t already (chronic multi-tasker over here). As I have gotten older the satisfaction in achievement has waned at times. I even went through a period of nihilism where everything seemed a bit pointless. That’s when I had to step back and think more about the deeper mission of achieving goals I set. I began to realize that no achievement is remarkable without appreciation for the effort that went into it. And even more importantly no end goal is worth Much if all the time spent reaching it is lost as either a blurred or stressful memory. In short, this year I have been actively trying not to begrudge all the steps between me and my objectives. I am trying to reflect each day as I go through the process of learning and growing and it makes those end goals feel less important and all the small wins along the way are the ones I get to cherish.

As for my resting resolution, I definitely need more work in this area. I have decided that the theme of 2020 will be rest for me once again. One great stride I made was in understanding my unhealthy relationship with rest and the guilt I feel when taking it. I began listening to the Stressproof podcast and in one episode the host, Susan Choi, talks about achievement addiction. I immediately realized that I had that. As Susan describes it, a symptom of achievement addiction may be the “your sense of achievement once reaching your goal is short lived, you minimize your achievements to yourself and others and say it’s really no big deal, you never feel at rest and often feel restless, (and more…).” I certainly lean toward feeling restless, minimizing my accomplishments, and chasing the next checkbox. Over the years I have noticed this in myself and I think this is in part where the guilt for resting or spending my time “unproductively has come from.” And while I have somewhat settled the restlessness and checkbox chasing, the inability to rest still remains. All that to say I am going to keep working at it because I know just how important turning off is to the creative mind, spiritual mind, and physical body.

My last big resolution was about faith, and I think that deserves a post on its own so I am going to save my thoughts for another day.

If you liked this resolution report card, check out my others from past years here. And you can see my visual summary of 2019 below with more detail on instagram.

What I Wore: Cozy Cool Weather Day

Outfit Details:

Jenni Kayne Cabin Sweater

Everlane Black Skinny Jeans

Mejuri Lotus Necklace

Jenni Kayne Canyon Boot

What I Wore to the Park

Autumn is finally hitting LA (despite it being 89F earlier this week), and my favorite thing to do is take a walk to the park to decompress. This outfit was me being lazy, but I ended up loving the causal look.

Outfit details:

For Days t-shirt. This tee super cool because I can exchange it for a new one for life and the old one will get recycled! #circularity

Thrifted black tank dress (similar here)

Madewell Sandals (from Poshmark)

Gifts for the Avid Traveler

The holidays are fast approaching and I have already been looking around for gifts for the special people in my life. One of my favorite ways to shop is finding similarities between me and the gift receiver and then basically shop for myself (don’t judge). In this gift guide, I am shopping for my fellow travel lovers.

Some of my most used and loved items include a sturdy and attractive backpack, versatile neck pillow, long-lasting tumbler, packing cubes, noise-canceling headphones, external battery pack, cute passport holder, and a travel journal to record all the memories in.

Books to inspire